Turn it Around

Every day we have choices. We really are in control of how we react to situations. Sometimes it is difficult….extremely difficult. Self control is something we are constantly working on in our family. It is challenging when someone makes you feel frustrated, uncomfortable or angry. As we say in our family…it is ok to feel sadness, anger, frustration, disappointment or any other emotion. We absolutely want to feel. Emotions and feelings bring out our inner selves. This is who we are and it is ok. It is ok to feel. It is important to feel…but it is also just as important how we react to what we feel. Just because we are angry, does not mean we lash out at someone. Just because we are hurt, does not mean we say hurtful words to someone. Think before you act. Yes…think before you act. This is the lesson my son received this morning in the book he is reading now. He even called me into the room while he was reading to tell me that Derek Jeter was giving this advice in his new book, Hit & Miss. He remembered that we talk about this often, and how important, but challenging it can be.

It is a challenge that kids face when other kids are unkind. We know this can happen often for kids, and for adults for that matter. I try to teach my kids to take the high road. Absolutely stand up for yourself, but do not say unkind things, just to get back at someone. Think before you act. This is an ongoing challenge for kids, and adults. I do understand, and we will continue to work on taking the high road, because in the end, that is where God would want us to be. It is not worth it to lash back at someone. It does not make you feel any better. We think it will, even after the fact, but it surely will not.

I was reading a blog post from one of my favorite christian writers the other day, and received the same message. I love when we continue getting similar messages from several places. It just reinforces the importance of this message for me, and giving me the reminders that I need. I have started this blog post several times and not found the time to finish. After reading her post, I made the time today to finish. I love the author Lysa TerKeurst, and she was facing a frustrating situation, and was talking to her husband about it. He told her to take the high road. He reminded her that God blesses you when you take the high road. What a wonderful, healthy perspective, and such a teachable moment for me and for my kids. We should not only take the high road, but we should learn from experiences that hurt us. We are able to choose our path, and we can learn how to avoid some hurtful situations that we have experienced, so that it does not happen again. I feel like we learn all over again with our kids, which is absolutely wonderful. Sometimes, it takes awhile to actually learn and begin to make choices that our healthier for ourselves and our family.

There are times when we do not think before we act, especially with those close to us…those we love dearly. For some reason, we show our loved ones our worst side many times. I have apologized many times to those close to me, for my actions. If I could only take my actions back, but that is not possible. That is when we do our best to turn it around. Yes. It is possible to turn around situations that mean something to you, and that might be going south. This can be applied to many things in life, but it is up to YOU. Yes, YOU. You have to suck it up and turn it around. You can not change others, you can only change yourself.

Say you feel awful. You are tired, stressed, unhealthy and out of shape. Start taking care of yourself. Begin today. You have to take the first step to turn your situation around. Take a walk, start eating healthier, start eating five small meals, take time to stretch or go to the gym. Just start making one healthy choice at a time.

Say you lost your patience with your mom. Call her. Apologize. Explain what you were feeling. Make her feel better and do your best to try to be more patient. Turn the situation around.

Say you were frustrated with your husband and said something that you regret. Go to him. Apologize. Encourage him and mean it. Hug him…tighter and longer than usual. Do not let the situation linger on, turn it around.

Say you have a relationship in your life that has been strained and you miss it. Make a call. Be honest. Be open. It is worth it if the relationship is important to you. This is not for all relationships. Sometimes you turn the situation around by moving on, and that is ok too. I love people and relationships, but it is ok to choose what feels good in your life. You can make that choice. Help your kids make that choice as well.

Hypothetical…say your son gets an attitude Sunday morning before church, because he does not want to go. Dad has to work, so he can not go. So son is mad that he can not stay with daddy. Mom finally says she does not want him and his attitude to go with her to church…not my finest moment, but yes thats what mom says. In the end, son gets in the car anyways, since mom told him not to. Lots of frustration in the car. Mom decides to take a breath, forget about it all and go to church feeling good with her two kiddos. Hugs and forgiveness. That is all it took. Move on. Forget what happened and start again. Turn the situation around. Do not go down with it. Below is the picture after church…happy church goers and Jesus lovers. We turned it around. Thank you Lord.

So, think before we act. Good lesson for the day, but we can also turn it around if we mess up. Thank goodness…because this girl messes up every day. Thank you Lord for forgiveness, love and do overs.

Enjoy today,

Kelley